Gleek

A friend from the office gave me a copy of Glee (volume one)... which led me to watch the first several episodes...

I am a gleek.

What I learned yesterday

Here's what I learned yesterday...
Ants are smarter than one would think, and sneaky and organized too...
Dogs shouldn't eat Borax because it costs me $65 to find out what to do.
My Lhasa Apso has an iron stomach, if I knew this earlier, I wouldn't have spent $65.
Borax, or possibly peroxide, acts as an aphrodisiac to my stoopid dog.
I can only protect the other (female) dog for so long, as soon as my back was turned the Lhasa gave it to her.
She was not impressed by his love making skills (or one would assume lack thereof).

Real Olympics

So here's how the Olympics should really work. My way would ensure that entire countries would be fit, that money would not be wasted on training a select few athletes and that everyone's health would improve.

An Olympic committee would go into each country and randomly pick people off the street to compete in different sports. Fatty in Iowa is running the marathon for USA like it or not. Pack-a-day smoker from Canada is our newest gymnast. You get the idea.

This would force all the competitive countries who want bragging rights to get their citizens healthy. I figure that the Finns, Swedes, Japanese and possibly the Chinese would do great under this new plan... and it might be a wake up call to countries who produce a small number of elite athletes, but also some of the fattest, most unhealthy and out of shape people on the planet.

Brotherly Love?

So, every few days since the beginning of the school year, my youngest has said "I love you B-" when his brother gets out of the car at school in the mornings. He ventures to say this once or twice a week as Eldest is closing the car door. Eldest never responds. This is typical of both kids, Youngest being very affectionate and Eldest being, well, not so much.

Each time he is ignored, Youngest sighs and comments on how his brother doesn't love him. In the beginning, I would make excuses about how Eldest probably didn't hear him. More recently I have explained that Eldest is getting to that age where "I love you" is a bit embarrassing. Youngest isn't happy but has become accepting of this.

This morning, as he was closing the car door, Eldest said "I love you N-". I paused for a moment, totally surprised by what had just happened. I smiled to myself and, after a few seconds, proceeded to drive away. From the back seat, Youngest said, "What, he thinks I'm going to marry him now or something?".

Such is brotherly love.

Hot Chocolate

Why is it that as soon as hubby leaves for a trip, my kids become deaf, dumb and clumsy? My youngest decided that this afternoon was the best time to try to bend a spoon. He figured it would be nice and warm from sitting in his hot chocolate. While trying to bend it, his arm slipped and knocked the hot chocolate all over the table. His older brother and he looked at this and decided that they would both come to find me to tell me. It did not occur to either of them that perhaps one of them should stay at the table and try to sop up the milk. It did not occur to them that perhaps the school papers that needed signing should be moved off the table. It did not occur to them that the chairs should be moved out of the way of the waterfall of milk (milkfall?). When I entered the room and yelled to my oldest to move the papers as I then ran to get paper towels, he of course couldn't be bothered to listen and instead decided that running around the table was the way to go. Youngest, deciding that his brother was on to something, followed him around the table. The end result was a sopping tablecloth, sopping papers, damp chairs and so on. Later, when I was asking about how the hot chocolate was spilled, Youngest said, "The dumb part was that I tried to bend the spoon- it wasn't hot enough". Yeah, that was the dumb part.

Deadwood

I have belatedly discovered Deadwood. Wu is awesome, and my husband's (he's Chinese) interpretation is spot on and therefore hysterical. I also caught a Mad TV spoof of Deadwood on YouTube that was so funny. We are almost halfway through season two.

Dog vs. Corn

My stupid dog, so pleased to have been able to get up on the dining table yesterday, decided to eat an entire corn cob. I knew it wouldn't be pretty when it came out but I truly underestimated the power of a dog stomach. I had to throw out the carpet in my hallway and later discovered more "joy" in my den- which has actually stained the floor. Stupid dog.